Real Men Wear Wooden Clothes
If you’re like me, you’re bored of wearing the same old materials, day after day after day. Cotton, wool, leather - we off that. We’re different. Me and you? We’re not even cut from a different cloth, we’re cut from a whole different material. From now on, real men wear wooden clothes - Where my clogs at?! As if I needed to tell you, these wooden bow ties are crafted from “the highest quality hard to find hardwoods and the best fabrics and leathers.” Obvi. why else would I have just burned all of my silk ties? Because fuck silk - that’s why. If you’re still wearing non-wooden accessories in 2013, you’re officially a herb. Don’t be surprised if you walk past me on the sidewalk and I act like I don’t know you.
Catch me at your local ugly sweater party
Some people go off the deep-end with graphics and brand names. Me? I tend to keep it pretty plain. Grey sweaters. Grey pants. Grey socks. All Grey Everything. Dad swag (word to my New Balances). I’ve never been one to make a real statement with my gear. Honestly, I just haven’t had the inspiration - until now. The temperature is dropping people, and I’m making a stand! I’m now officially representing the Brrrrr Gang. BRRR GANG YO! Club Monacco really put the team on their hat with this one, fo’real. Someone holler at me when they have a full letterman jacket with this across the back so I can rep my set during my trips to get more
excuses to drink rum eggnog. Until then, you can catch me at your local ugly sweater party in this hat, hogging all the snacks.
You’re only buying kicks to instagram them anyway.
So you live in Halifax, and your brain is telling you to buy footwear built for Saltslush Season (formerly: winter). Your first instinct is “fuck that, my shoe collection is way too ill to start using my brain now”. To be fair, these days you’re only buying kicks to instagram them anyway, so who cares what happens to them. If you can get a few good flicks before ruining them in line at Toothy*, you’ve proven your point. When someone makes fun of your clunky ass Blundstones in February, hand them those new business card’s you made with nothing but your instagram handle on it. When they see your collection of foot-selfies, they’ll respect you. “First you get the iphone, then you get the selfies, then you get the women” - Tony Montana, or something like that, right? The point is, you need a pair of suede-mesh sneaker-boot’s. To be honest, these Roshe Run’s are more confused than our seasons - I wouldn’t have it any other way.
*This blog does not condone going to toothy. But we understand if you accidentally go … weekly.
Too Busy to Make Decisions
Remember being 7 years old, when your biggest dilemma was whether you wanted to be a pilot or a detective? Well Thom Browne just did 7-year-olds everywhere a solid by providing a new option: Both. To be honest, if you have a uniform that includes these glasses you’re probably too busy to make a lot of decisions. Why? There are too many crimes to solve and planes to fly to pick out your own outfits. Hurry up, before you get called for your next flight/mission.
Spotted at: Hypebeast